Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Resident Junkie... 5/15/13

In the time it takes
For a single breath to pass
Your lips
Everything changed....
Because no matter who I am today
No matter how I've changed
All anyone will ever see
Is the old me
The one under the skin
Where the scars from my
Addiction
Still hide...
Scars that were once again
Flayed open and
Bared to everyone

And once again
I was able to prove myself
For the person I've become
The woman I've fought
So hard to find
The me I've been wanting to be
Instead of the one I once destroyed
But it never seems to matter
Never seems to make a damn bit
Of a difference to anyone
That I was able to prove my
Innocence when I was once again
Blamed, vilified, accused
And vindicated
I am still the broken bitch
Unable to crawl out of her hell
Dirty and bruised from the fall
Instead of the person
I have become

And this is something that
No matter how hard I try
Will continue to happen
Because of my past choices
And I know that I must accept
This reality
Embrace it
Because it will always follow me
No matter what I do
Or how I change...
The moment something comes up missing
You will always blame the
Resident Junkie...
And all I can do is silently
Hand over proof of my innocence
And begin again...
And brace myself
For the next one in line....

1 comment:

  1. You are wrong... never blamed or accused, only asked. A mistake was made and you've proven you are clean. No need to dwell on something you should infact be proud of. I only pray you see that now as we all do.

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