Thursday, November 1, 2012

Deserved 11/1/12

I just want to sleep
To forget that I'm alive
Forget that I still breathe
Today is just me here with me
And my company sucks
Especially today
If there was a way
I'd run so far and so fast
Away from me
I can't put this together
In any way that makes sense
I'm so tired
I want to find a way
To step outside of myself
So that maybe I can put
This new shit
Into some kind of order
Because it just doesn't make sense
It just doesn't make any kind
Of order in my chaos
I do not deserve this
Especially this
And I deserve a lot
I can't turn my music up
Loud enough
To drown out the sound
Of the screaming
Inside my head
Inside my heart
Over something that isn't
Meant to be mine
And I know
It's just a matter of time
Before I have to account
For my sins
And let you all see
Just how far
I've let myself

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