From my childhood
As all I ever aspired to be
I wanted so badly
To grow up
And to be
Just like you
You never failed
To make me feel
Loved
To show me
How to feel
Beautiful
On the inside first
And foremost
Where it counted
The most
Somehow
I lost that lesson
Along the broken road
I've called home
For so damn long
That I almost forgot
My own name
My own face
No matter how long
I stared into the mirror
Looking for sanity
Amid the complete
Insanity
Of my existence
All that I loved
All that I once held dear
Very sweetly
Turned away
When I needed them
The most
But you need to know
I held the memory
Of you
In a strangle hold
And refused to let go
Of the memories
Of the moments we shared
All the while I was
Working so hard
On losing me
Along with all hope
Of a future
Right along with
Everyone I loved
And lost
I swear,
I thought I'd completely
Destroyed
Any chance
I may have had
To have you
Come into my life again
So when the night came
That the phone rang
And your beautiful voice
Caressed my soul
With a simple "hello"
From my childhood idol
My teenage image of awesomeness
My twenty's version of a real woman
My junkie's view of what I'd never achieve
To today's fear of rejection and heartache....
Kari, you are no longer
The person I view as perfection
Because now that I'm a big girl
And I've walked this broken road alone
And learned the lessons that my life
Has desperately tried to teach me
I know now that no one is perfect...
We all make mistakes
Even childhood idols
So I've taken you down off the
Platform of perfection
And I've placed you in this new
Category that I've created
Because it fits how I see you now
More than any other
So I've got you filed cousin, soul sister,
I now have you listed
As one of my
Saving Graces
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